What up fellow stoners, been a long time since I've been around these parts. In fact so long that I forgot the email and username i originally signed up on this site with. Naturally after all the great horticulture advice i received here i turn here first for this all most important of questions.
As an adult, mature and ready to enter the workforce, I have been burdened with having to pass a DRUG TEST!!!!!
As soon as I heard back from the company, (which when I applied I considered a long-shot so I happily continued my merry existence toking away), I immediately stopped exposing myself to Cannabis related toxins. Unfortunately, the time period from me hearing back from the company and my drug test date has been unusually swift.
I stopped exposing myself to toxins May 18th at 9:24pm. My drug test is June 1rst 1pm.
My scenario is this, and I come here seeking the sage advice of fellow citizens who have in their time found themselves in a predicament of similar circumstances:
I value this job very much. As such I immediately quit exposing myself to cannabis related toxins as soon as I heard back from them. However with only 2 weeks, (really 13 days and about 15 hours), to prepare for the test I am nervous I would not pass it. My toxin exposure has been pretty frequent and heavy, usually multiple times in the evenings for the past 2-3 months.
I have been drinking a gallon of water a day since May 19th and plan to keep this up until the day before the test. I work out (weight-lift) 3-4 times a week. This is not for preparation, but rather habit and I only assume it could aid my detoxification process as my metabolic rate increases with exercise.
Not content with leaving the fate of my drug test to unpredictable anatomical processes, I purchased a Whizzinator (the real and original one). It came with one vial of Golden Shower Synthetic urine. I have read on several websites that this synthetic urine when mixed properly has an appropiate pH balance, creatine levels, etc.
My question is, in a fairly rigorous drug test will this synthetic urine pass as the real thing in case I can not legitimately cleanse my body in time? Does anyone have any personal experience with the product? Is this 'synthetic' urine actual dehydrated human urine? Is it chemically identical to real urine? Or is it merely something that kind of looks and smells like urine that would not pass a serious analysis.
Thanks in advance for any replies.
An old compatriot of these parts